Hitting the Reset Button

Pool of Misery

For the last six weeks, I've been fighting a monster in my 5th period class. Every teacher has that one class that is just dead set on chaos, destruction, and failure. Although, I'm sure it isn't a conscious effort on their part, they make my life hell and I get to return the favor. My time has been spent putting out fire after fire, telling kids to sit, stop talking, work, don't throw things, don't waste my sticky notes, no you can't go to the bathroom right now, sharpen your pencil when I'm done talking and so on forever and ever. My time has not been spent on teaching. It's been spent on discipling and training the students how to be human beings in my class. 

However, yesterday was the tipping point. I had a substitute so I could plan for a professional development seminar I am doing on Monday. The news wasn't good after 5th period. When the dust settled, I'd written three parents e-mails, a referral, and this letter.

I read it to them today in class. At the beginning, the culprits giggled, but by the middle, you could hear a pin drop. 

To My 5th Period:

I haven't hid that you are the most difficult class I've had to deal with this year. I've dubbed you my "worst class" and you've taken that label and made it your own. I don't deny that I dread 5th period everyday much like I'm sure all of you do. It's the truth for all of us and because of that we are all just swimming in a pool of misery. Every year I've always had that "one class" that was bent on chaos and self-destruction. And every year, I just accept that that's how it's going to be and just count down the days until they are gone. However, I'm determined to break that cycle now.

Part of the problem is me, I know. I helped create this 5th period monster with my attitude, actions, and sarcasm. First, I have to say sorry and seek forgiveness for my own fault in the matter. I will do a better job in controlling my frustration; I will be more patient, and I will hold back comments that could be hurtful even if I think they are funny. These are all ways I know I've made you dislike me as your teacher. 

Now, you must realize your own guilt in this situation as well. Since you are 9th graders, I know that sometime in the last 8 years someone has taught you general classroom etiqutte. But just in case, I'll review so we are all on the same page. First, having conversations with your friends across the room is generally frowned on in this establishment for many reasons. It's distracting, it's rude, and it's turning the class focus on you instead of learning. Second, yelling my name over and over again because you want my attention only makes me want to ignore you. Especially when you consider that 8 or 9 of you are doing it at the same time. Just imagine trying to focus on something when that many people are yelling at you at once. If you need me, raise your hand and wait. The worst thing that could happen is you'll learn to be patient. That or you'll learn how to solve problems on your own. Both of which are great lessons to learn. Third, sharpening pencils while anyone is talking is considered bad form. Certainly, waiting for an opportune moment would be better for everyone. Fourth, generally, walking around the room for no apparent reason is a bad idea. I'll explain. If you are up without a purpose, your purpose will soon become mischievous in nature. This leads you to make bad choices that disrupt others, stop learning, and cause you to get in trouble. All of which could be avoided if you just stay in your seat. Fifth, we have 50 minutes to learn as much as possible 180 times a year. I understand that sounds like an enormous amount of time, but it's really not. Therefore, anything outside of the current agenda for the day should be dealt with outside of the time we have in class. Basically, if you have any questions about anything that isn't included on the current day on the agenda board, then it should be held for tutoring time. For further clarification, this includes grades, missed work (past and future), homework questions, Blackboard questions, ways to earn class passes, class points, extra credit, and any extracurricular activities done by either you or me. 

I understand these things seem insignificant, but when the majority doesn't adhere to these general classroom practices, it creates chaos, as you have witnessed for the past six weeks. 

I also understand that this may seem like I just want you to behave to make my life easier. And while that is an attractive byproduct that isn't my main focus. 

For the most part, you as students have an "us vs. them" mentality when you come to school. It's usually the students vs. the teachers. This mentality sets us at odds with one another and most teachers would say that we are on the same team, but I disagree. Teachers are fighting against you. As you sit in your seat I am actively waging war against you, but I'm not fighting for myself. I'm fighting for YOUR future selves.  

I believe education offers infinite opportunities to those who take advantage of it. A few weeks ago, I was getting my oil changed. I happened to be wearing my school shirt and while I was paying the guy behind the counter he noticed and asked what I taught. I told him freshman English. He laughed and looked away a little embarrassed when he said, "I wasn't great at English. That was the class that kept me from graduating." I wasn't really sure how to react. I didn't want to laugh with him because dropping out isn't funny, but I didn't want to stand there awkwardly either. Finally, I said, "Wow! That's a bummer. Do you wish you could go back?" Even as I asked the question, I knew I was overstepping the bounds of mechanic and customer, but it just popped out. He could have gotten offended and slashed my tired. But he thought for about .2 seconds and said, "Everyday of my life." He went on to tell me he knew he wouldn't be changing people's oil for a living if he'd just done what he was supposed to do. Instead, he barely scrapes by. 

Ultimately, a decision he made as a high school student dictated his future. So, back to how I'm fighting for your future selves. I'm determined not to see you in 5, 10, 20 years and hear that you are like the man who changes oil. I know you believe that what you do here doesn't matter, but it absolutely does. And until the day you figure that out for yourself, I'm going to do my very best to fight for you even if you won't. Even if that means making you stay in tutoring, or taking away your phone, or writing you a detention or referral, or contacting your coaches and parents.  

Teachers say all the time (me included), "If they want to fail, just let them. It doesn't bother me any." But if I'm really honest with myself, it absolutely affects me. And when you are 25 or 30 or 89 I want you to look back at high school and know that I did everything I could, even got on to you everyday, to keep you from not just failing my class, but from becoming a failure. 

Last thing. I also know many of you believe nothing I have to teach you in English will help you later in life. Can I just point out that English is language and language has more power than many of the other things you depend on in your life. Language has the ability to get you that great job. It also has to ability to keep you from it. Language can get you a girlfriend or boyfriend. It can also make that girl or boy you like think you are an idiot. Language can help you get promotions and demotions. So, you're probably right. Knowing the story of "The Most Dangerous Game" won't get you far in life. But if you remember when we started reading the story, I told you that. We were reading it to learn about language and how to use it effectively. The day you learn to harness the power of language is the day you figure out that you can encourage, motivate, bolster, lead, persuade, manipulate, harm, cutdown, and belittle people. Language when used for good can do great things, but it can do equally terrible things. It's my job to teach you to decipher language so you can have the power to do good, hopefully.  

It's true that language is power. For example, with my words, I named you my worst class and you rose (or fell) to those expectations. Again, I'm sorry for that. but I hope that these words can help move us in a different direction. One that your future self will be proud of. 

Our class discussion after I finished reading was enlightening and encouraging. One student said I was wrong about them not liking me. Another asked why teachers separate friends if we didn't want them yelling across the room. So, it was hit and miss. But, I will say that today the culture of my 5th period changed radically from when I began the letter to when it ended. Time will tell if this reset button moment is permanent or not. Either way, I'm glad to have gotten the chance to be honest with my kids.

Happy teaching!